Brothers
Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter. The man at the counter asked the older boy, “Son, how old are you?” “Eight,” the boy replied. The man continued, “do you know what these are used for?” The boy replied, “not exactly, […]
Old Ladies
Two old ladies are outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain. One of the old ladies pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, puts it over her cigarette, and continues smoking… Maude: What in the hell is that? Mabel: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn’t […]
25 Ways to Improve Your Health
1.) Brush twice a day! 2.) Dress right for the weather. 3.) Visit the dentist regularly. 4.) Get plenty of rest. 5.) Make sure your hair is dry before going outside. 6.) Eat right. 7.) Get outside in the sun every once in a while. 8.) Always wear a seatbelt. 9.) Control your drinking of […]
Redneck Classic
Redneck Harley…… Redneck Bass Boat…… Redneck Grill…… Redneck Horseshoes…… Redneck Lawnmower…… Redneck Weather Station….. Redneck Pet Carrier…… Redneck Gingerbread House…… Redneck Wedding Reception……. Redneck Cat……. Redneck Guest Bedrooms……. Redneck Palm Pilot…….. Redneck Powerball Winner……. The above Powerball Winner on Vacation……. Redneck Yacht: You are a redneck if… A little rain doesn’t spoil the fishing… You […]
Somewhere in China
When you need to relax and just get away….. may I suggest ‘A Day at the beach in CHINA ” ??? WONDER WHERE THE TOILETS ARE?
How a Butterfly Destroyed my Roof
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Thought for the Day
Man cannot discover new oceans until he has courage to lose sight of the shore. Anon
I love this Doctor!
Q: I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that’s it… Don’t waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that’s like saying you can extend the life of your car […]
Texas Cowboy
A modern day cowboy has spent many days crossing the Texas plains without water. His horse has already died of thirst… He’s crawling through the sand, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him. He crawls […]
Discipline
Every child should have an occasional pat on the back as long as it is applied low enough and hard enough.
