Idiot Sighting
IDIOT SIGHTING #1 My daughter and I went through the McDonald ‘s take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said, ‘you gave me too much money.’ I said, ‘Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a […]
Thought of the Day
When men speak ill of you, live so that nobody will believe them. Plato
Gentlemen, Look For the Right Insurance!!
A wealthy hospital benefactor was being shown around the hospital. During her tour she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating furiously. ‘Oh my GOD!’ screamed the woman. ‘That’s disgraceful! Why is he doing that?’ The doctor who was leading the tour calmly explained: ‘I’m very sorry that you were exposed to that, […]
The New Physician
I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive Lab tests, he said I was doing ‘fairly well’ for my age. (I just turned 60.) A little concerned about that comment, I couldn’t resist asking him, ‘You think I’ll live to be 90?’ He asked, ‘Do you smoke tobacco, drink beer […]
Thought of the Day
Don’t measure a man’s success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom. General George S. Patton
Can You Recognize Them?
Angelina Jolie . . . . . . . Bjork Britney Spears . . . . . . . . Bruce Willis Cher . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Christina Aguilera Demi Moore . . . . . . . . . . Drew Barimore Elton John […]
What Religion is your Bra?
Hope this will give you a chuckle, have a good day!! A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy’s and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, ‘I’d like to buy a bra for my wife.’ ‘What type of bra?’ asked the clerk. ‘Type?’ inquires the man, ‘There’s more […]
Rabbi’s Son
The Rabbi’s son had just gotten his driving permit, and approached his father about the use of the family car. His father said, “I’ll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your Talmud a little better, get your hair cut, and then we’ll talk about it.” After about a month, the […]
