Fly in the Toilet
When I went to the men’s room in the Schiphol Airport when we got to Amsterdam, I saw the fly and did my darnest to ‘wash’ it down the drain…. but failed.. I figured the fly had super glue foot pads!!! Now I know why it was there! Who says you can’t potty train a […]
Angels Explained By Children
Too darned cute!!! I only know the names of two angels, Hark and Harold. -Gregory, age 5 Everybody’s got it all wrong. Angels don’t wear halos anymore. I forget why, but scientists are working on it. -Olive, age 9 It’s not easy to become an angel! First, you die. Then you go to Heaven, and […]
Thought of the Day
But now I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth. Umberto Eco
Senior Dating
Georgette en Adrienne, twee ‘gezellige vriendinnen’, zijn aan de klap. Adrienne: ‘Diene geestige Theo heeft mij gevraagd om uit te gaan. k’wete daje gij vorige week met hem uitgeweest zijt en daarom wilde ik u eerst spreken voordat ik hem mijn antwoord geef.’ Georgette: ‘Wel, Ik zal het u vertellen. Gij waart juste weg en […]
Woman’s Prayer
Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods; Because Lord, if I pray for Strength, I’ll beat the crap out of him.. Amen
Important Information
Very important information has just been made public that I think is something you should all be aware of: Gonorrhea Lectim. The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of this old disease. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim. It’s pronounced “Gonna re-elect ‘im.” The disease is contracted through […]
Mixed Emotions Explained
A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology and explaining the phenomenon of “mixed emotions”. The husband turned to his wife and said, “Honey, that’s psychology babble is such a bunch of crap. I bet you can’t tell me anything that will make me happy and sad at the same time.” […]
Ladies Casino Trip
Four friends spend weeks planning the perfect girls getaway trip – casinos, massages, facials, shopping… Two days before the group is to leave Mary’s husband puts his foot down and tells her she isn’t going. Mary’s friends are very upset that she can’t go, but what can they do. Two days later the three get […]
