The Blue Pigeon
The mayor of Haifa was very worried about a plague of pigeons in Haifa. He could not remove the pigeons from the city. All of Haifa was full of pigeon poop; the people of Haifa could not walk on the sidewalks or drive on the roads. It was costing a fortune to keep the streets […]
Chuckle for Cinco de Mayo
It was once said that a black man would be president … “WHEN PIGS FLY”… Well sure enough 100 days into Obama’s presidency… SWINE FLU!!!
Making Babies
The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, ‘Well, I’m off now. The man should be here soon.’ Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby […]
Human Body
*It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. *One human hair can support 3 kg (6.6 lb). *The average man’s penis is three times the length of his thumb. *Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. *A woman’s heart beats faster than a man’s. *There are about one trillion bacteria […]
Geest
Een getrouwd stel is aan het golf spelen op de meest luxueuze golfcourt van het land, midden in een super exclusieve villawijk. Bij het derde hole gekomen zegt de man tegen zijn vrouw: ‘Hier moet je goed oppassen waar je slaat, want we staan dicht bij de huizen en een kapotte ruit zal hier wel […]
Best Divorce Letter Ever
Dear wife: I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was […]
At the Pet Store
A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks, in the sweetest little lisp, between two missing teeth, “Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?” As the shopkeeper’s heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he’s on her level and asks, “Do you want a widdle white wabbit, or […]
Tough Business Woman
A little old Jewish lady sold pretzels on a street corner for 25 cents each. Every day a young man would leave his office building at lunch time, and as he passed the pretzel stand, he would leave her a quarter, but never take a pretzel. And this went on for more then 3 years. […]
The Brick
A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead, a brick smashed into the Jag’s side […]
